Need a Shoulder to Cry On? How About a Papal Blessing? Or a Magic Spell?
Updated: Apr 16, 2022
Sometimes we just need a little extra help to get through a rough patch. Maybe it’s a tough time at work that you’re slogging through, a love affair that’s getting complicated, or a sick relative you’re worried about. Perhaps a mid-term exam is looming, or you’re just having a bad hair day.
No matter. This is when a touch of divine intervention or a bit of professional expertise could really go to bat for you. Consider these nine free, or otherwise reasonable, out-of-the-ordinary tactics.
1. Ask Master Igor
Croatian certified psychic Master Igor will answer three questions you ask of him for $10. He suggests asking specific questions about love, life, and career, whose outcomes he can foresee. “If you wish to hear the truth, sometimes some things which are not expected, then you are in the right place.”
Master Igor will send you his psychically divined answers to your questions within 48 hours. Quicker turnaround times and additional questions are available for $15-20.
Igor is a Fiverr bestseller with nearly 11,000 five-star ratings from users.
2. Put a Prayer in the Wailing Wall
If the Almighty has an inbox, surely it’s the ancient Western Wall located in the Old City of Jerusalem, also known as the Wailing Wall. Here, Christians pray in unity alongside Jews, reflecting their shared spiritual heritage. Pilgrims began stuffing small written prayers and requests for divine assistance into the wall’s crevices in the 18th century. The practice continues today with more than a million prayer notes left in the wall each year.
Now you can submit your prayers and notes online at the Western Wall Heritage Foundation. Staffers there will print off your note and insert it into the wall. Notes are kept private and never read. You can also submit a separate prayer request for the health of loved ones. Your prayer intentions will be read during the next day’s recitation of the Psalms at the Wall.
Both of these virtual services are free of charge.
3. Beam a Message Out Into Space
Send your worries, wishes, or greetings out into the cosmos for free. The folks at SpaceSpeak will encode your message and beam it out into space on radio waves using 12 micro PC transmitters located around the world. “Your messages will continue to fly through space long after Earth is consumed by her aging Sun, five billion years from now.”
You can add an image or audio clip to your message for $2, or have the message continuously pulsed out into space for 24 hours ($5), or annually on the same day of the year ($25). You can also track your message’s journey on the SpaceSpeak homepage.
Even if you never hear back, it just feels good to reach out and share with the rest of the universe.
4. Solve Any Math Problem
Add the following: 3x - 2y + 2y + 3z + 2z - 4x - 5y. Stumped? So were we.
But you can get the answer to this and any other math problem from simple arithmetic to advanced algebra and calculus with Microsoft Math Solver.
This free app for iPhone and iPad app allows anyone to snap a picture of a math problem – be it handwritten or printed – and get an instant solution with step-by-step instructions that demonstrate how to solve the problem on your own. It also includes a mathematical keyboard so you can easily type math problems instead of hunting around a traditional keyboard for the characters you need.
5. Hire a Shoulder to Cry On
All we really need sometimes is someone who will listen to us when we have to rant or sort things out or just talk. Fiverr's Greg Morrison is that guy. World traveler, grad student, level-headed entrepreneur, and all-around nice guy. He will listen to your problems or ideas and give you his personal take on how to make the best of your situation and move forward.
Especially helpful when you don’t really want to bother your spouse, best friend, or coworkers with your troubles or latest great new idea. $25 gets you a basic 30-minute, one-on-one listening session with Greg via Zoom or Zoom chat; additional session packages available.
Doesn’t really matter what you talk to Greg about – sports, dating, travel, work, boredom -- you will feel happier afterwards. That’s how good he is.
6. Get the Pope’s Blessing
If you are within the sightline and ear shot of the Pope when he blesses the crowd, then the blessing takes effect for you, according to the Vatican. But if you can’t make it to St. Peter’s Square or arrange for a private audience with the Holy Father any time soon, you can order a papal blessing online.
While you can’t get his benediction for your latest Kickstarter scheme or job application, you can order a personalized parchment with the Pope’s photo and blessing to commemorate a birthday, anniversary, wedding, and a few other life milestones.
Prices range from $21-26, depending on parchment style, plus shipping via DHL Express Courier.
7. Turn Your Dreams Into NYE Confetti
Even though it’s only been a few weeks since New Year’s Eve, it’s never too early to dream. Submit your hopes, dreams, and wishes for 2023 now and turn them into official Times Square confetti.
Your wishes will be transferred onto small pieces of confetti paper and added to the millions of other hopes and dreams submitted by people from all around the world. Your dream or wish will then get blasted out of the official confetti cannon high above Times Square on New Year’s Eve, December 31, 2022.
It's free, and you still have plenty of time to collect your thoughts.
8. Have Someone Write Your Love Letters
Often when you fall in love, it’s nearly impossible to think straight. This is when you need to contact Alessandra. She’ll help you compose the perfect romantic missive. Then she will handwrite it on nice stationery in her charming cursive style and mail it to your crush directly from Paris, the City of Love.
A 40-word love letter written on white stationery costs $25; $30 gets you an 80-word letter on colorful stationery, and for $35 she’ll compose a 150-word love letter and mail it out the same day.
Alessandra is a designer who was born in Sweden, raised in Italy, and lives in Paris. She knows how these romance things work.
9. Cast a Magic Spell
You’ve tried everything else, so why not cast a magic spell, especially if it’s free?
Spellbinder Xara Matsagou’s original Change Your Life Spells site lets you cast a spell online that’s designed to improve your life. Most of her enchantments involve friendship, romance, attraction (“Choose this Attraction Spell to become more attractive, more beautiful or to cause someone else to become more attractive and beautiful”), and money.
But she also has a number of assorted special interest spells like, Breakup, Sex Change, Hair Change, Revenge, Quit Smoking, and Education (“…to receive the education you desire or to cause someone else to receive an education”), so you’re all set for just about any situation that invoking the spirts might help resolve.
More than 8,000 people like Xara’s online spells which “…are free, and always will be.”
Photos (from top): Anxiety by Andrea Piacquadio from Pexels; Master Igor; Western Wall, © Simon Mannweiler/Wikimedia Commons/CC BY-SA 4.0; outer space by NASA on Unsplash; Microsoft Math Solver app, Microsoft.com; Greg Morrison; Pope Francis, Vatican.va; Times Square, Timessquarenyc.org; Handwritten Love Letters from Paris; magic spell by Rhett Wesley on Unsplash.